Having just woken up from a night’s sleep on my rock bed inside the cave where I am now staying, a remote cave far, far away from any civilization, I think I’ll head outside for a walk. Of course, since I woke up alone, as I always do, I’ll just wander down to the river by myself, sit down on the grassy riverbank, toss small stones into the cool water and become lost in my thoughts.
Chances are I won’t even speak today, but that’s alright, because I’m used to it. Rarely do I meet or talk to anyone during my wanderings, no matter where I am. The truth is, a life of travel requires me to accept an isolated, lonely existence, and nothing else.
Sure, it would be nice to have a companion, a partner, a girlfriend, someone to share my wanderings and my life with. But again, that’s just not possible with this kind of lifestyle. When you travel the world non-stop, there is simply no room for personal relationships, no room for love. My backpack is the only partner I can have, and the only partner I need.
Wait, wait, wait…hold on a minute. I must apologize.
You know, I am constantly asked how I can possibly live such a lifestyle, one that gives me zero chance of having a relationship with someone else. I think I’ve heard this question so many times that I started to believe it myself as I began writing this post.
It seems that when many people hear that I’ve been traveling for thirteen years, they quickly assume that I must be some sort of wandering monk or maybe just some kind of weirdo who walks around alone, barely speaking, rarely interacting with other people and absolutely never having any type of relationship or gettin’ any lovin’ at all. They think I must be a hermit.
Well, surprise! I’ve actually had a few long-term relationships over the years (more than 1 year in length) and I’ve had some shorter relationships as well. I’m meeting new people all of the time, and yes, I do talk to and socialize with them, just as non-nomadic people talk to and socialize with each other. Also, as is the case with everyone else on the planet, I never know where such interactions may lead. Sometimes, ‘something’ happens. Some of the people I meet become friends, others become girlfriends and with some, we might exchange a smooch or two and then carry on with our own lives. And maybe one day, someone I meet will become a lifelong partner. It’s certainly possible and I’m open to the idea.
Not very hermit-like of me, I know.
As you may have noticed, though, the one thing I don’t talk much about on this blog is this very subject, my personal relationships. I’m more than happy to talk about my armpit shaving and introduce you to my rubber ducky, but I do prefer to keep at least one aspect of my life all to myself. Again, this doesn’t mean that I’m a lonely, lover-less traveler, at least not all the time.
So Many People To Meet!
If you’re worried that following your travel goals will force you to give up any chance whatsoever of finding a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife, my advice is to stop worrying. In fact, you should be quite excited because your travels will allow you to meet new people all over this great planet, people you otherwise would have never encountered. And you never know if the next person you’ll meet in some faraway, or even nearby, land will be the snuggle bunny or sexy sweet thang you’ve been waiting for.
My theory is that I have a higher chance of finding someone I can truly connect with if I am doing something that I truly love in life. Following my goals puts me into situations where I am able to meet like-minded people all the time, such as other travelers and locals interested in meeting foreigners, something that would be much more difficult to do if I was living in one particular town or city back in the USA.
Can Such a Relationship Last?
This is another common question – how is it possible to maintain a relationship while traveling?
If you do find someone that you connect with and want to spend more time with, you just have to examine your situation. If both of you have a desire to travel, then off you go into the world together. If your new partner is not able to travel or doesn’t want to travel, it’s decision time. You simply have to determine what is more important to you – spending time with this new person or carrying on with your journey. It might not be an easy decision to make, but ultimately, you will find the answer if you search deep enough.
As an example, maybe you travel to South America for three months and during your third week you meet the man or woman of your dreams in Buenos Aires. What to do? You could always postpone your travels, especially if you’re flexible and don’t organize too much in advance. You could stick around Buenos Aires for some time and see where the relationship leads. Maybe it will work out. Maybe it won’t. If it doesn’t, you move on and continue traveling. If it does, you stay with your partner and create new plans together.
And besides, if you do find someone who you really think is a perfect match for you, then chances are your entire mindset will change (which happens often in life anyway). You’ll reevaluate your goals and make changes to your life accordingly. You might not want to travel so much anymore if that means losing your new honey, baby, sweetie, darling, angel eyes, pumpkin, stud, pooh bear, cupcake, buttercup, sugar lips, booberry, dumpling, daddy mack or love muffin.
Even I, despite being so completely addicted to travel, would change my lifestyle if I found the perfect love muffin.
What’s your opinion? Do you think travel makes it harder to find a partner?