
You want to travel. You make a vague plan. Maybe you’ll fly to Thailand or maybe to Mexico, but either way, you’re leaving in six months time. You start saving money, you start doing research every single night and your level of excitement grows with each passing hour.
Of course, as this will be your first ‘real’ travel experience, you naturally prefer to travel with other people and so you start asking your friends to join you on your epic adventure. As you show them photos you found online of white sand beaches on a Thai island and of the Mayan ruins of Chichen-Itza, you are more than confident that you will have a travel partner or two in no time at all.
But interestingly enough, the first friend you ask, perhaps your closest friend, turns you down. And so you move on to the next friend, but they too, tell you that they have no desire to join you at all. The third friend, the fourth friend and even that guy that you don’t really like but whose company you think you could stand for a few months in Southeast Asia, all say no as well.
Suddenly, you are faced with the idea of embarking on a journey to faraway and very foreign lands all alone. You start to doubt whether or not you are up for the challenge, whether or not you have the courage necessary to survive as a solo traveler.
Maybe you decide to postpone your trip for another six months, hoping that one of your friends will change their mind and decide to tag along. Maybe you decide to forget about your trip altogether, fully convinced that you can only travel so far away from home with a friend or travel companion by your side.
You still desperately want to travel, so much so that you still spend many a night awake in bed researching random destinations, reading every travel article you can find and browsing through travel blog after travel blog. But now you try to accept the fact that what you read and see online is as close as you’ll come to actually traveling yourself.
DON’T GIVE UP JUST YET!
Perhaps, during your online dreaming, you stumbleupon my travel blog and you decide to stick around long enough to read a couple of posts. Maybe you find yourself reading this very post and you can relate to that process of giving up on your travel goals simply because you don’t want to travel alone. And in all honesty, if that is the case, then I’m quite happy that you are reading this post right now.
Here’s my advice to you. You may be on your own when you board that flight to Bangkok or Mexico City, but believe me, once you arrive, you’ll NEVER actually be alone.
That’s how travel works. Unless you stare at the ground and never talk to anyone, you’re going to meet people when you travel, lots and lots of people from all over the world who will be interested in meeting and hanging out with you. In fact, meeting new people is probably one of the easiest things to do when traveling because you have an instant connection with every other traveler. All travelers are strangers in a foreign land and as a result, we often would love an opportunity to travel with a new friend.
Maybe you’ll meet someone at the hostel or guesthouse where you’re staying or at a cafe, in a shop, on a bus or just in the street. Maybe you’ll end up wandering around a city for an afternoon with this person and then parting ways. And the next day, you’ll probably meet someone else to share new experiences with as well. Perhaps you’ll meet someone and decide to travel together for a couple of days or even a couple of weeks. Maybe your plans match up so well that you team up for a month or more.
The point is, you’ll meet plenty of people in just about every single corner of the world, even if you’re the most shy, introverted person on the planet.
MY FIRST SOLO TRIP
When I left for Southeast Asia back in 1999, I did so all alone. Sure, I asked every single one of my friends to join me, just as most of us would do, but they all said no. However, after a long, hard internal debate, I made the decision to visit Asia anyway, with no travel companion. And this decision proved to be the most important decision I have ever made.
I won’t lie to you. When I boarded that flight from Los Angeles to Bangkok, I was shaking. I was so scared of the uncertainty that awaited me that I could barely even think and as a result, I couldn’t help but realize that this was the most terrifying experience of my life.
In fact, several years later, when I was given ten seconds notice one day that I would have to give a forty-five minute presentation to 1000 people on a cruise ship, the fear I felt at that moment was NOTHING in comparison to how I felt on that flight to Thailand.
But of course, despite the fear, as I soared high over the Pacific Ocean, high over Taiwan and eventually into Southeast Asia, I knew that there was no turning back.
AND THEN MY FLIGHT LANDED…
…and I passed through immigration and customs at the Bangkok Airport and I even managed to make it from the airport into the city center without any problems despite the fact that it was after midnight. I spent the night in a budget hotel room and then, during my first stroll around the streets of Bangkok the very next morning, I met a British traveler at a cafe. We started talking and sure enough, we both had planned to travel overland to Cambodia in order to celebrate the Millennium at Angkor Wat.
That was it. Just like that I had a travel partner, less than nine hours after I had arrived in Bangkok. And we got along so well that we ended up traveling together for almost two months.
Will that happen to you when you embark on your adventure? There’s no guarantee of course. But again, if you look up, smile and start conversations with those around you, the chances of you actually being alone are quite miniscule (unless you want to be alone).
And before long, you’ll understand why I answer every single email that asks me what it’s like to always travel alone with the very same response. I simply say, “I may be a solo traveler but I’m never really on my own.”
So, with that now said, I urge you to not let the fear of traveling by yourself stop you from achieving your travel goals. It would be such a shame to let that happen, especially when that fear will disappear shortly after you arrive at your first destination.
Have you experienced this fear? Have you reconsidered your travel plans when your friends didn’t want to join you? Do you agree that meeting people is quite easy while on the road?


Back in 1999, I left home for a 3 month trip to Asia that has still yet to end.





Hi Earl,
This post popped up in a google search on solo travel and I’m so glad it did. I’m 31, in a senior position at my corporate job, getting married this Oct, and positively wracked with anxiety about whether or not I should make the decision to quit and make my SE Asia travel dreams come true before “real” adulthood obligations come and find me. I actually shed tears reading because your words hit some soft achy spot inside of me. I feel a mixture of extreme guilt (I have a wedding to pay for!) and also sheer panic that if I don’t do this now then I’ll probably never be able to do it until I’m an old retired fart. As I enter this month, I know I need to make a decision soon. And that’s where I’m at right now. Hopefully I come back to this site with a positive update. Thank you for what you do!
Hey Michelle – Do let us know which direction you choose to go in!
I just wanted to say that I am so glad I stumbled across this on google as I am terrified of flying into Asia on my own this wednesday!! I am so worried I wont meet people to travel with but what you have written has put my mind at ease, so thanks!:)
Hey Jess – You’ll have a blast and be sure to let us know how it goes!
Hello-
I am making my 5th overseas solo trip 3 weeks. I joke that when I need “alone time” that is when I pack up my bags and passport and head out for a month at a time. I’ve made wonderful friends along the way & I really wish more people would embark without the saftey net of “I need someone there with me.”
Hi
Thank you for your story. I was just talking to my Aunt about how I want to change my plans to travel to South East Asia within the next week, because I will be traveling alone, and then I saw your story. I haven’t booked my flight or anything yet, and I haven’t even prepared. I have traveled on my own in the past many many times, but something about this one is making procrastinate. However, your story has given me some confidence and some support to move forward with my plans. So thank you and I’m going to go to the travel agent tomorrow.
Marilyn
Michelle! Just go do it! Before or after your wedding….he will wait! Let him know your dreams, despite whether or not it will ostracize him. My woman and I just split ways because I want to go travel and she can not(/already has). But before we split, I knew that if she went, I would wait, and if I went, she would wait. It’s that simple.
Hi Earl,
Well I quit the day after I wrote the comment! I was a wreck at first wondering if I had just destroyed our life before we even started but my heart grew lighter and lighter as it got closer to my last day of work and when it finally happened, I was SO relieved and I wholly believe it was the right thing to do. The stress and repressiveness of that job was hurting me mentally anyway and it really needed to end.
I’ve got tickets booked and visas are in process. It’s not easy, some days I’m all worries and other days I’m filled with excitement. I’m not looking for a new job yet, I’m going to let that rest until my return when I’m refreshed and have some clarity.
Again thanks for all the encouragement you give to everyone!
Hi Julian, I did! I quit and bought my tickets to get outta here! My fiance is extremely supportive and that was a huge factor in my decision to do this. He went on his dream solo trip to Korea a few years ago and feels that I should have that opportunity to travel on my own as well regardless of the financial hit we’ll no doubt experience. Yes, it’s so important that you have the support of your partner or spouse and I think this bodes well for our future.